Hair today gone tomorrow...

It was about 3 weeks after getting my diagnosis before I started chemotherapy. As I said in my last post, I wanted to keep busy and distract myself from what was going on so I went to the Galway races with my work colleagues and met up with some friends..

Deirdre, Me, Clair & Aisling enjoying some drinks! 

The following week we went to Madrid for a long weekend, we had to cancel the cruise so booked this very last minute.

Me pretending to eat a ham! 

I started Chemo on 19th August, a Monday. I figured that doing Chemo on Mondays was the better day to start as hopefully the effects of it would have worn off by the weekend and I would be able to enjoy the w/e with Gordon. I chose the Galway Clinic as my preferred hospital as it was easier to get to from Tuam.
The night before I did what I normally do on a Sunday night before work, I put on my tan, washed and blow-dried my hair. I wanted to look my best going in!! I didn't sleep much that night, I was nervous thinking about the chemicals that were going to be pumped into my body, losing my hair, what if it didn't work.. etc. That morning, I got up had my shower, put on my make up and a lovely top that I had bought in Madrid, it had a pair of angel wings on the back and it was my kind of way of saying, this ain't going to break me, I got my wings!!!
Gordon drove me in, we had to pass my workplace and there were tears in my eyes, I know we all have the Monday morning blues about going into work but this Monday morning I wanted to go to work so badly.
We got to the uber glamorous Galway Clinic and headed up to the 3rd floor where they have the chemotherapy day ward. I found a chair that was at the very end of the room out of the way. I had decided before all of this and you may say that I'm selfish but I didn't want to talk to other people in there. I didn't want to hear about their horror stories, about it being their second or third time. I wanted to get in and get out without any negativity, so I had prepared myself as to avoid chatter with my Chemo neighbours. Don't get me wrong, I smiled and was nice but I didn't want to engage in conversation that might end up making me upset. I had my Sony DVD player and headphones and I planned on watching the Breaking Bad box set which I never seemed to have time to sit down and watch.
I had my bloods taken and I was telling the nurse about my new "fur baby" Mr Bond and of course had loads of pics to show her, once my bloods came back and they were fine, they brought down the Chemo drip. Firstly they gave me an anti-sickness tablet, and then a steroid drip, following that was the Chemotherapy drip. As it infused, I could feel my arm getting cold, a funny feeling in my sinus and I could taste it. All in all I was in there at about 9am and out by 12:30pm. We went home after that for a while, I wasn't sure how I would react but to be honest, I felt pretty okay.
Roll on a few hours later, I had an appointment with my GP so I was getting ready to go in to meet her. I could feel my stomach cramp and started to feel sick. We headed off in the car with the window open to get some fresh air into me.

We arrived at the doctors clinic and I felt sick, I had to puke, now bearing in mind we were in a car park and was trying to stay classy. I was scrambling to find something to puke into. Luckily Gordon had a plastic bag and I puked in that, then realised there was a hole in the bag and the contents leaked onto Gordon's new car.. sorry Gordie!!!

They brought me straight into the nurses room and I had to lie down. We met my GP and I wasn't able to talk to her, again Gordon had to do most of the talking while I hovered over the sink in her surgery. We picked up my tablets from the chemist next door and headed home again. Gordon got all the tablets ready for me and I took whatever he gave me, after a few hours I felt better. The following day, I got the Neulasta injection which is a sore injection but helps to bring your bloods back up after the Chemo. My good friend Deirdre or my neighbour Pauline would come out every Tuesday after Chemo to give it to me as I was too afraid to give it to myself. We made a rule, injection first then wine after! Never the other way around! :)
The injection while it brings your bloods up, does have a side effect, it makes your bones very sore and achy, like you are getting a flu. By Thursday of that week it had taken full effect but by Saturday it was nearly gone. The following week was my good week but I still had to be careful not to come into contact with people that were sick. I swear if I heard someone sneeze, I was running in the opposite direction!

We had gone to Dublin that week to pick out my new hair as I knew it would be falling out. This was going to be the worst thing for me, I am vain, I love make up, and pretty things and losing my crowning glory was not going to be easy. I had gone into Galway but there wasn't anything that I liked, blonde wigs are so much harder to get than dark ones. We headed to The Hairclub in Donnybrook as it looked like they had lots to choose from. I picked one, which to be fair was better looking than my own hair!! (They were brill by the way, and would totally recommend them plus cheaper than Galway and lots to choose from)
It was the following Sunday the day before I was due to go in again for Chemo that I was scratching my head and a load of hair fell out in my hand. I got upset looking at the hair and was like f**k it, it's starting to happen. The following day I called Bellisimo in Galway to get it shaved, you don't want it to start falling out in patches and end up looking like yer man from the Goonies.

Myself and my sister Angela had arranged to go together. We were in Galway and we were mooching around the shops waiting for my appointment. Now I didn't know how I was going to react to someone shaving my head, so I had brought my trusty Xanax with me, I stopped in a shop and bought a little carton of OJ to wash it down, my sister looked at me and said, I might need one of those as well, so we split one in half and downed it. We drove on a Xanax high to Bellisimo and headed in. They brought me into a back room and I told the girl that I didn't want to look at her doing it, so to turn me around from the mirror which she did.
She started to shave my head, I chatted to her about some mundane things until I saw my sister crying beside me. Now bear in mind, she has had cancer twice, lost her hair twice, and she was sitting there watching her little sisters head being shaved. Now if she started so would I, so I told her to pull herself together and to think of happy things like bunny rabbits and Santa Claus and "...had the Xanax not taken effect yet!" We laughed and once she had finished shaving my head, she put on the wig and fixed it. I looked better than when I had gone in!!

Me with my new hair! 

So after that, Angela thought I would want to go home after such trauma, why go home when you can go to The G Hotel. I suggested that we grab some lunch and a cocktail to mark the occasion. I had a pulled pork bap and a Mojito! We sat in the lounge while I sipped my cocktail and a lady had caught my eye as she walked past. Without even knowing it or realising it, I had said "oh the poor devil, look at her she has cancer" (she was wearing a headscarf) now, the words were literally just uttered from my lips when I realised that, wait a second, so have I!!! I'm after getting my head shaved a few minutes ago. I knew then I had made the right decision for me regarding my head wear. Not everyone will want to wear a wig, yes they can be uncomfortable, hot, have to be careful if it's windy, but for me, I wanted to look and feel as normal as possible and blend into the crowd. On the plus side, your hair always looks done, you don't have to blow dry to have perfect salon looking hair! I actually got lots of compliments from strangers regarding my hair!!!

The Chemotherapy continued for 16 weeks (8 sessions every 2 weeks) and yes there were ups and downs but I got through it. I don't really remember it now, I think it's like when you have a baby, you forget all the trauma and your body doesn't let you remember it.
I used to see this sign every time I went into have Chemotherapy. Think about it and next time you have the Monday morning blues, just remember there is someone somewhere that wishes that they were able to go into work. It might make it a bit easier to get out of bed. :)

Health is a crown worn by those who are well and seen only by the sick.

P.S. I have undertaken to run a 10k to raise money for Breast Cancer Research (NBCRI).
If you would like to support me you can click on the link and donate here! Thanks.. xx                                                                             http://www.mycharity.ie/event/yvonne_dolans_event/